Yard rule No. 1: If you fertilize, get ready to cut grass. A lot. A whole lot. Maybe even two or three times a week.
Yard rule No. 2: The completion level of my landscape plan is directly affected by the imagination of my wife and the number of magazine pages she tears out.
Yes, she's still carpeting parts of our house with ideas literally ripped from the pages of various periodicals.
There's an article about what ivy grows best in what climate, another about the beauty of mandevillas, another about keeping color in flowerbeds all winter, and another about the joys of daylilies.
And all I can see is more Saturdays and Sundays spent elbow-deep in potting soil.
I think someone must have added some of that fertilizer to my "honey-do" list.
But I'm not the only one battling the summer heat. I spent an afternoon last week out at the Thomson High School practice field. The next incarnation of the Thomson High Bulldogs spent a few hours working out with the Warren County Screaming Devils. Both teams ran through a series of offensive and defensive schemes, sweating the whole time.
The afternoon was also a homecoming of sorts for a couple of Warren County's head honchos. Head Coach Lee Hutto - a former THS player and assistant coach - and Assistant Coach Alvin Wright - a former THS assistant coach - were back on Bulldog soil, joking with some of their old players and coaches.
They've got a pile of talent in Warren County and the experience of coaching with Luther Welsh in their backgrounds. You just may see the early stages of a tradition rebuilt one county over this season.
Speaking of something great in the early stages, the plan to create a wireless network for downtown Thomson is officially getting off the ground. I firmly believe the creation of the network would be a cornerstone in the revitalization of downtown Thomson. It would allow computer users to connect to the internet throughout the downtown area.
That would help bring people and businesses downtown, adding even more fuel to the downtown revitalization push.
If it gets the OK, the wireless network would provide one more opportunity to throw myself on the mercy of internet purveyors.
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My inbox overfloweth.
Whether it is my Mirror e-mail account or my personal e-mail address, my life has become a stack of junk mail. Spam filters be darned. Sure, it's easy to delete, delete, delete.
But who has the time for such nonsense? There's an exiled Nigerian dignitary who's willing to share his millions with me.
That would buy a whole bunch of plants and shrubs. And maybe even hire someone to plant them all. Now that's a pipe dream I can follow.